Iris: let's go to steve ballmer's house and play practical jokes on him
Iris: actually we can't, can we
Iris: there are lasers
Iris: hmm
Iris: according to wikipedia, he doesn't live in a house, either
Iris: but instead in something called the "ballmerdome"
Iris: i like to imagine that it's just a giant version of those ball pits you see in indoor playgrounds
Iris: he plays in it constantly, and if you visit him, he says "HEY, COME ON IN! WATER'S FINE! NO SNAKES!"
Iris: the ballmerdome is what he calls his head
Iris: if you ask him a difficult question he'll say "uh, hmm, hold on, let me get the ballmerdome in gear"
Iris: and tap his head to indicate that he's referring to his brain
Iris: then he'll get pumped up
Iris: by shadowboxing and running around and throwing chairs
Iris: and eventually jump out a plate glass window
Iris: the ballmerdome is a tiny dome-shaped outhouse that he makes his guests use when he's mad at them
Iris: "you have to poop in the ballmerdome!" he says
Iris: and they do because they really have to go and his regular bathrooms are all locked
Iris: to get back at him, they steal toilet paper
Iris: which just makes things worse for the next person who gets sentenced to the ballmerdome...
Iris: the ballmerdome is what he calls the head of his penis

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